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Q (James Bond) Soundboard

Now this one, I'm particuarly keen about
You'll find a little red button
Now if you take the top off
You see the gear lever here?
If you just sign here Mr Bond
Now here's something I want you to use with special care
Whatever you do, don't touch it
Because you'll release this section of the roof
And engage and then fire the passenger ejector seat
I never joke about my work 007
This is now being issued as standard equipment
Strap it on your wrist
It's activated by nerve impulses from the wrist muscles
Be careful will you
10 darts, 5 blue tips with armour piercing heads, 5 red tips cyanide coating
Causing death in 30 seconds
I think he's attempting reentry Sir
Now, take a fountain pen
Twist the top
A highly concentrated mixture of nitric and hydrochloric acid
Dissolves all metals
Pay attention 007
007 on an island populated exclusively by women?
We won't see him until dawn
It goes by hot air
007 alive
Just cleaning up a few details
Weapon please
One pane unbreakable glass, one standard issue ring finger
Twist so
Ultra-high frequency, sonic agitator unit
Hmm, still better than looking cleverer than you are
Your new transportation
The ultimate in British engineering
As I learnt from my predecessor Mr Bond, I never joke about my work
Aston Martin call it the Vanquish, we call it the Vanish
Adaptive camoflage, tiny cameras on all sides project the image they see onto a light emitting polymer skin on the other side, to the casual eye, it's as good as invisible
Plus all the usual refinements, ejector seat, torpedoes, target seeking shotguns
Wish I could make you vanish
Something we're making for the Americans, it's called the Ghetto Blaster
Be careful 007
It's just had a new coat of paint!
Stun gas, effective range, ooh about 5 feet
Disorientates any normal person for about 30 seconds
Grow up 007
Thought you'd pay more attention to a female voice
With special care
Yes I know, but that's an underwater camera
It takes 8 pictures in rapid succession by pressing that button there
Well if you can take pictures in the dark with an infrared film, then yes
Ah, 007


Occupation Quartermaster Affiliation MI6 Portrayed by Peter Burton, Desmond Llewelyn, John Cleese, Alec McCowen Q is a fictional character in the James Bond novels and films. Q (standing for Quartermaster), like M, is a job title rather than a name. He is the head of Q Branch (or later Q Division), the fictional research and development division of the British Secret Service. The character actually appears only fleetingly in Ian Fleming's novels, but comes into his own in the successful Bond film series; he is also mentioned in the continuation novels of John Gardner and Raymond Benson. The character of Q (although not always identified as such) has appeared in every 007 film apart from Live and Let Die and Casino Royale (2006). Screenwriter of Quantum of Solace Paul Haggis confirmed that 'Q' is not included in the script. Casino Royale showcases a number of gadgets and sophisticated tools used by Bond, however the film does not indicate whether a Q Branch per se exists in the revised Bond universe. Ian Fleming based the character of Q on Charles Fraser Smith, a real life engineer of gadgets for escaping servicemen during the Second World War. Contents [hide] * 1 Development o 1.1 In Novel o 1.2 In Film * 2 Official James Bond films o 2.1 Peter Burton as Major Boothroyd (1962) + 2.1.1 Featured in: o 2.2 Desmond Llewelyn as Q (1963–1999) + 2.2.1 Featured in: o 2.3 John Cleese as Q (1999 - 2002) + 2.3.1 Featured in: * 3 Unofficial films o 3.1 Featured in: * 4 Related characters o 4.1 Q in Casino Royale 1967 satire o 4.2 Q'ute * 5 See also * 6 External links [edit] Development [edit] In Novel The ancestry of the Q character is rather complicated. In the Fleming novels there are frequent references to Q and 'Q Branch' with phrases like "see Q for any equipment you need" (Casino Royale) and "Q Branch would handle all of that" (Diamonds are Forever), with a reference to "Q's craftsmen" in From Russia with Love. In the sixth novel, Dr. No, the service armourer Major Boothroyd appears for the first time. Fleming named the character after Geoffrey Boothroyd, a firearms expert who lived in Glasgow, Scotland.[1] He had written to the novelist suggesting that Bond was not using the best firearms available. Boothroyd is also referenced occasionally in the Bond novels of John Gardner, but the author preferred instead to focus on a new character (see "Other Qs", below). [edit] In Film In the films, Major Boothroyd first appears in Dr. No and later in From Russia with Love, although played by different actors. Beginning in Goldfinger and in each film thereafter Major Boothroyd is most often referred to as Q, however, in The Spy Who Loved Me (1977) he is referred once again as Major Boothroyd in dialogue. Some sources, most notably the 1980s James Bond 007 role-playing game suggested that Boothroyd's first name was Geoffrey (the real Boothroyd's given name), although no first name was ever mentioned in the novels or on screen. In the non-canonical James Bond Jr. cartoon series, Boothroyd's grandson was Horace Boothroyd III, suggesting that Major Boothroyd was also named Horace. [edit] Official James Bond films [edit] Peter Burton as Major Boothroyd (1962) In the first film, Dr. No, Boothroyd is played by Peter Burton in only one scene in which he replaces Bond's Beretta .25 pistol with Bond's signature .32 Walther PPK handgun. The character later appeared in From Russia with Love played by Desmond Llewelyn, due to scheduling conflicts that kept Burton from reprising. [edit] Featured in: * Dr. No (1962) [edit] Desmond Llewelyn as Q (1963–1999) Desmond Llewelyn portrayed the chartacer in every film after (except Live and Let Die) until 1999 in which he is showed to retire and be replaced by John Cleese in The World is Not Enough.`In the James Bond films, the relationship between Q and Bond is one of fatherly exasperation ("Oh, grow up, 007!") met with adolescent indifference. The exception is during From Russia with Love, Llewelyn's Bond debut, in which he simply introduces the gadgets, then makes sure Bond knows how to work the booby-trapped briefcase catches. The relationship was established by director Guy Hamilton in Goldfinger, when he explained to Llewelyn that he didn't want Q to actually like Bond, since the agent tended to abuse and destroy Q's gadgets when in the field. Famously, he tells the agent, "I never joke about my work, 007" (a line referenced by his successor in Die Another Day). However, on occasion, Q has shown a warm and fatherly concern for 007's welfare, such as at Bond's wedding in On Her Majesty's Secret Service, and when, at the behest of Miss Moneypenny, he secretly sneaks gadgets out of MI6 to help Bond survive his vendetta against the drug tyrant Sanchez in Licence to Kill. Arriving unannounced in Isthmus City (posing as Bond's Uncle – similar to how he posed as Bond's father in You Only Live Twice), he flatly tells the agent, "If it hadn't been for Q Branch, you'd have been dead years ago" — to which Bond has no answer. Respect seems to bloom between them, with Bond telling Q he is "a hell of a field operative". Later in the film Q is seen using a broom which conceals a walkie-talkie and then throws it away — quite ironic considering the number of times he has lectured 007 to take care of his equipment. The growing respect is also evident in GoldenEye when Q actually shares a joke with Bond for the first time, and when in The World Is Not Enough he reveals his plan to retire. Bond is clearly crestfallen at the thought, and Desmond Llewellyn's Q signs off with some touching last words of advice, "I've always tried to teach you two things: never let them see you bleed; and always have an escape plan" — before he is lowered out of view. In the novel of Goldfinger, the relationship between Bond and Q is more clearly defined, with Bond telling himself that he only tortures Q so badly because of their close friendship. The gadgets Q supplies are almost invariably destroyed as a result of Bond's use of them, and Q is constantly exhorting Bond to take better care of them and to occasionally read the instruction manual. This may seem unfair, given the fact that many of them are designed to explode. Before introducing any new gadgets, Q often says: "Now pay attention, 007." Bond usually responds by displaying an instant mastery of whatever device Q hands to him. In addition to these scenes in his own hi-tech laboratories, Q occasionally meets Bond in the field to deliver some equipment or to personally handle some specialised devices to assist Bond. This occurs first in the film Thunderball, with Q himself somewhat excitedly commenting on the novelty of it. Later, however, it becomes the norm and goes so far as in Octopussy, where Q aids 007's getting onto the Octopus Cult's island and later gives some help in the final battle; and in the aforementioned Licence to Kill. In the series, Boothroyd was preparing to retire during the events of The World Is Not Enough (1999) and has clearly retired by the time of Die Another Day (2002), but it was not indicated on screen whether the character has since died. In the PlayStation game 007 Racing (2000) however, the character "R" (voiced by John Cleese) specifically says: "Q could drive better than that, and he's dead!" (a possible unintended reference to the driving accident that killed actor Desmond Llewelyn in real life). [edit] Featured in: * From Russia with Love (1963) * Goldfinger (1964) * Thunderball (1965) * You Only Live Twice (1967) * On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969) o This is the only time in which Q calls Bond "James", during the wedding scene with Tracy. * Diamonds Are Forever (1971) * The Man with the Golden Gun (1974) * The Spy Who Loved Me (1977) * Moonraker (1979) * For Your Eyes Only (1981) * Octopussy (1983) * A View to a Kill (1985) * The Living Daylights (1987) * Licence to Kill (1989) * GoldenEye (1995) * Tomorrow Never Dies (1997) * The World Is Not Enough (1999) Llewelyn also portrays Q in the EON Productions-produced TV special Welcome to Japan, Mr. Bond (1967). Llewelyn portrays Q in the documentary Highly Classified: The World of 007, which is included on the Tomorrow Never Dies Ultimate Edition DVD. To date, Llewelyn has appeared in more Bond movies (17) than any other actor. [edit] John Cleese as Q (1999 - 2002) In The World Is Not Enough an assistant to Major Boothroyd (Q) was introduced, played by comedian John Cleese. His real name has yet to be revealed, but he is initially credited as R in The World Is Not Enough, stemming from a joke in which Bond asks the elder Q: "If you're Q, does that make him R?" Between films, Cleese was still referred to as "R" in the video game 007 Racing (2000) and in Agent Under Fire (2001), though not all of the video games are canonical. He was officially referred to as "Q" in Die Another Day (2002) following actor Llewelyn's death in 1999. In 2004, Cleese was featured as Q in James Bond 007: Everything or Nothing. Initially portrayed as rather clumsy, R has since become more self-assured and more in the style of his predecessor to whose job he has since been promoted. They both share the same attitude towards their professional work. In Die Another Day, Bond at first refers to R as "Quartermaster" (The Die Another Day DVD reveals that Bond initially saw R as an 'interloper', only awarding the proper title of 'Q' after R has proven himself) but, silently impressed by the gadgets he is given, calls him "Q" at the end of their meeting. However, in The World Is Not Enough, in a sequence where Bond's car is destroyed, he comments "Q's not going to like this", despite the fact that Q, as played by Llewellyn, had retired by this point and R had been elevated to the position. According to an interview on the Die Another Day DVD, Pierce Brosnan was very glad to rename Cleese's character 'Q', rather than 'R', because his native Irish accent made it difficult to pronounce 'R' with a convincing "British" accent. Although having some similar characteristics, Cleese's Q is almost a radical departure from Major Boothroyd. From the start, Cleese's Q never liked Bond based simply from Bond's reputation of not returning items in pristine condition. When Bond tries to joke with Q, Cleese's Q is a lot quicker at comebacks than Boothroyd's was, making him more of a match for Bond in terms of wit. Bond: "You're cleverer than you look." Q: "Still, better than looking cleverer than you are." or "Ah yes, the legendary 007 wit, or at least half of it." With the reboot of the Bond series in Casino Royale, the Q character and Cleese were left out. Scriptwriters for the upcoming Bond film Quantum of Solace have confirmed that Q will not appear in the film, but it is unknown if Cleese will reprise the role in any future films. In the 007 game, Everything or Nothing, Cleese's Q has an assistant, Miss Nagai, portrayed by Misaki Ito. [edit] Featured in: Films: * The World Is Not Enough (1999) — as R * Die Another Day (2002) Games: * Everything or Nothing * 007 Scene It [edit] Unofficial films In the 1983 unofficial (non-EON Productions) film Never Say Never Again, Q Branch is headed by a man (played by Alec McCowen) referred to by Bond as "Algernon" and "Algy", though his opening line is "Nice to know old Q can still surprise you 00s." In the closing credits, he is named as "Q Algy". It is never stated whether he is intended to be a successor to the EON Q (like the film's M is said to be) or actually a manifestation of Boothroyd. Since this film is generally not considered as canon, it can be said that it takes place in an alternate universe, different from that of the EON films. Algy's relationship with Bond appears to be friendlier than that of Boothroyd, with Algy actually looking forward to the "sex and violence" of a new 007 mission. Q Branch itself is depicted as underfunded (per dialogue) and ramshackle compared to the high-tech surroundings of the EON films. [edit] Featured in: * Never Say Never Again (1983) [edit] Related characters [edit] Q in Casino Royale 1967 satire In the 1967 version of the non-EON production Casino Royale, Q is played by Geoffrey Bayldon, although he kits out not James Bond, but one of his substitutes Evelyn Tremble (Peter Sellers). Generally held to be one of the stronger sequences in the film, the famous gadget sequence is mercilessly lampooned. "It's an American idea," Q tells Tremble as he gives him a watch with two-way camera attached, "they got it from one of their comic strips," a reference to Dick Tracy. In this film, Q is assisted by Fordyce (John Wells). [edit] Q'ute John Gardner, in his James Bond novels, introduced the character of Ann Reilly, a young female assistant to Q whose co-workers as well as Bond nicknamed Q'ute. Major Boothroyd himself was only mentioned a couple of times. During Licence Renewed and For Special Services, Q'ute and Bond maintained a brief romantic relationship. Afterwards, it was revealed a number of times that Bond and Q'ute were involved in a casual relationship. By the time Gardner left the book series, Q'ute had taken over the running of Q Branch, but when Raymond Benson took over the literary series, he ignored much of Gardner's continuum and gave Q Branch back to Major Boothroyd with no explanation and no further references to Ann Reilly.