Other soundboards

Die Another Day Die Another Day

Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere

Goldfinger Goldfinger

Dan Ashcroft (Nathan Barley series) Dan Ashcroft (Nathan Barley series)

Nathan Barley series Nathan Barley series

Flash Gordon Flash Gordon

M (James Bond) M (James Bond)

Phoenix Nights Phoenix Nights

Friends Friends

Claire Ashcroft (Nathan Barley Series) Claire Ashcroft (Nathan Barley Series)

The Bill The Bill

Ricky Gervais Ricky Gervais

Car Park Catchphrase with Roy Walker - BBC Radio 1 Car Park Catchphrase with Roy Walker - BBC Radio 1

Q (James Bond) Q (James Bond)

King of the Hill King of the Hill

Licence To Kill Licence To Kill

David Brent (from The Office UK) David Brent (from The Office UK)

Richard Ayoade Richard Ayoade

Peep Show Peep Show

Octopussy Octopussy

Jonatton Yeah? (Nathan Barley series) Jonatton Yeah? (Nathan Barley series)

George W. Bush George W. Bush

The Living Daylights The Living Daylights

A View To A Kill A View To A Kill

Tony Blair Tony Blair

Doug Rocket (Nathan Barley series) Doug Rocket (Nathan Barley series)

Nathan Barley AKA Trashbat Nathan Barley AKA Trashbat

Live and Let Die Live and Let Die

Family Guy Family Guy

The Simpsons The Simpsons

Buck Rogers in the 25th Century Buck Rogers in the 25th Century

Little Britain Little Britain

The Apprentice - UK The Apprentice - UK

Gremlins Gremlins

Ned Smanks (Nathan Barley series) Ned Smanks (Nathan Barley series)

The IT Crowd The IT Crowd

Tomorrow Never Dies Tomorrow Never Dies

Michael Jackson Michael Jackson

Borat Borat

Wayne's World Wayne's World

From Russia With Love From Russia With Love

Midnight Candymen and myhouse-yourhouse.net Midnight Candymen and myhouse-yourhouse.net

American Dad American Dad

Tim Canterbury (from The Office UK) Tim Canterbury (from The Office UK)

George W Bush - State of the Union 2006 George W Bush - State of the Union 2006

Thunderball Thunderball

Scarface Scarface

James Bond 007 James Bond 007

Eastenders Eastenders

I'm Alan Partridge - Series 1 I'm Alan Partridge - Series 1

Gareth Keenan (from The Office UK) Gareth Keenan (from The Office UK)

The Chris Moyles Show The Chris Moyles Show

Moonraker Moonraker

Casino Royale Casino Royale

The Office (UK) The Office (UK)

Jones (Nathan Barley series) Jones (Nathan Barley series)

Claire Ashcroft (Nathan Barley Series)

Claire Ashcroft (Nathan Barley Series) Soundboard


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This is the coke head from last night?
Do you mind if I crash here?
And I'll be through in a minute
Claire Ashcroft
Trashbat?
Michelle gets the £20,000
I'm a filmmaker
Really?
Piss off
Yeah thanks
What the fuck is that?
Hello?
Really?
She's so coked up she's probably stoped menstruating
Thanks
A deep breath for my fucking money Dan!
Ah for fuck's sake!
Is that Doug Rocket?
How?
Is that what you're after, a loan fuck?
Wow
Who's he?
What about my edit you dickwad?
Do you mind?
Claire Ashcroft
Yeah
Yeah
What's this about?
What?
What do you think of my proposal
Dan!
Are you hard up for entertainment
Er, yeah
Which bit's that?
The guy?
You didn't read it did you?
Well what should I start my pitch with?
You alright Dan?
Have you got my money?
The rejects of society
The people we see every day but we ignore because we're too busy listening to our iPods and thinking about kitchens
It's not really meant to be funny
I've just told you
Yeah right
I've come about the film grant
Which bit shall I start with?


Claire Keelan is a British actress best known for her role as Claire Ashcroft in the Channel 4 comedy Nathan Barley. Other roles include Michael Winterbottom's 2005 film A Cock and Bull Story. She is a former member of the Royal Court Young People's Theatre. Nathan Barley is a Channel 4 sitcom written by Charlie Brooker and Chris Morris, starring Nicholas Burns, Julian Barratt and Claire Keelan, which follows the exploits of a loathsome, fictional twenty-something Hoxton, London media type. The first episode of six weekly episodes was broadcast on 11 February 2005 on Channel 4. Described by his own creator as a 'meaningless strutting cadaver-in-waiting', the character originated on Charlie Brooker's TVGoHome � a website parodying television listings � as the focus of a fly-on-the-wall documentary called Cunt. After the cult success of TVGoHome, the name "Nathan Barley" was frequently used pejoratively towards those whose lifestyles were satirised by the series. Contents [hide] * 1 Plot * 2 Characters * 3 Promotion * 4 Cast * 5 Nathan Barley 2 * 6 References * 7 External links [edit] Plot Nathan Barley played by Nicholas Burns is a webmaster, guerrilla filmmaker, screenwriter, DJ and in his own words, a "self-facilitating media node". He is convinced he is the epitome of urban cool, and therefore secretly terrified he might not be, which is why he reads Sugar Ape magazine, his bible of cool. The magazine is an obvious parody of Vice Magazine and even has one issue called "The Vice Issue". In reality however his output is of no real interest to anyone but him and his immediate friends. The website consists of stupid pranks caught on camera, photos of him with attractive women and famous figures (some of them digitally edited to insert himself), and photos of him standing on street corners in major cities around the world. He is fully of the belief that because he has a camera, some knowledge of web publishing and a webspace, this he has a talent. The humour derives from the rapid rise of both the internet and digital television, and the assumption by publishers and broadcasters that almost any such work is worthy of attention. Barley and his peers are often hired ahead of actual journalists and talented writers trying to make intelligent points, such as the earnest documentary film maker Claire Ashcroft, and her brother Dan Ashcroft, a jaded and apathetic hack who, having written an article for Sugar Ape entitled "The Rise of the Idiots", is disgusted to find that "the idiots" in question � Nathan and his contemporaries � have adopted him as their spiritual leader, failing to see that they are the very people he was criticising. [edit] Characters The series features two other central characters, siblings Dan (Julian Barratt) and Claire Ashcroft. Dan � an instantly recognisable Brooker point-of-reference � dislikes everything Nathan Barley stands for, while Claire seeks to highlight the plight of the inner city's homeless and drug-dependent. Ironically, while Dan sees a clear distinction between himself and the "idiots", he's frequently forced to compromise his own ethics in order to earn a living, and seems to be fighting the dawning realisation that he may actually be the very thing he despises. At the same time, Claire, who clearly wants to see herself as socially responsible and philanthropic, ultimately only seeks to further her own career. This sets the scene for an unusually open-ended, and certainly introspective, satire-bordering-on-social-commentary. Other recurring characters include the staff at Dan Ashcroft's magazine, Sugar Ape, such as asinine chief editor Jonatton Yeah? (Charlie Condou), Ned Smanks (Richard Ayoade) and Rufus Onslatt (Spencer Brown), a pair of gormless graphics designers, Sasha the receptionist (one of the few non-'idiots' in the show), and the eccentric and ludicrous Doug Rocket, founder member of The Veryphonics (a parody of David A. Stewart of Eurythmics), played by comedian David Hoyle. Dan Ashcroft's flatmate is a DJ called 'Jones', who appears blissfully unaware of the antisocial cacophony he creates. Jones is played by Noel Fielding, Barratt's partner in comic duo The Mighty Boosh. [edit] Promotion A piece of Nathan's artwork. A piece of Nathan's artwork. Advertising for the series attracted some attention, with billboards advertising a fictitious yet almost plausible mobile telephone, the Wasp T12 Speechtool ("it's well weapon"), appearing throughout the UK. This device was advertised as being exceptionally loud, with several hugely annoying ringtones, a giant key for the number 5 (allegedly the most common number), a powerful projector, a business card printer and miniature turntables for scratching MP3s. It was also apparently "shark-proof". Barley's website, www.trashbat.co.ck, serves as an official site for the television series, and remains active as of August 2008. The DVD of the series was released in October 2005, featuring all six episodes, a host of extras (including the pilot) and a booklet written by Nathan featuring his 'artwork'. The artwork in question is largely in the style of prolific graffiti artist Banksy and the book could easily be mistaken for a book showcasing Banksy's work. [edit] Cast * Nicholas Burns � Nathan Barley * Julian Barratt � Dan "Preacher Man" Ashcroft * Claire Keelan � Claire Ashcroft * Ben Whishaw � Pingu * Richard Ayoade � Ned Smanks * Spencer Brown � Rufus Onslatt * Charlie Condou � Jonatton Yeah? * Nina Sosanya � Sasha * Rhys Thomas � Toby * Noel Fielding � Jones * David Hoyle (aka "The Divine David") � Doug Rocket * Rupert Degas � Beer Gourd Man * Ophelia Lovibond � Mandy * Joe Van Moyland � Mudd * Montserrat Lombard - Monika [edit] Nathan Barley 2 Continued rumours of a second series of the comedy,[1] including possible auditions for extras,[2] were given added weight with reports that Chris Morris told students at a talk at Bournemouth University that he was working on new Nathan Barley material. The new series will centre on Barley's new-found employment in a general "media-facilitation" role for a small East-London based terrorist organisation.[3][4] Further evidence of another series has been given weight when Flak magazine reported that Chris Morris and Charlie Brooker were working around the scripts amongst other projects.[5]